It’s a bit chilling, hearing the mechanical voice of my iPhone counting down to my future. Granted I selected this future and gave my iPhone all of the details, so it is not nearly as sci-fi as I wish it  could be (that can be left to another app). VoiceAlarm is an app available for both the iPhone and iPod that is a talking version of the built-in clock application. Voice Alarm is currently counting down to my specified event.

“45 minutes until your girlfriend leaves.”

VoiceAlarm can also be used as a speaking alarm, timer, a stopwatch, and a clock. But I have chosen this to see if my fear may be true. Is a voice alarm annoying? We’ll find out as I set it to Intelligent Annoucements, which will actively change the frequency of announcement to announce more often closer to the specified event.

VoiceApp gives you many options on what it can count down to including dinner, meeting, free food, doctor, gym, experiment, eggs… This list goes on and on. I cannot discern the categorization of events other than speculating that it must be listed in the chronological order of each epiphany the developer had for use of this application.

“35 minutes until your girlfriend leaves.”

VoiceAlarm is quite customizable, but I can’t help but wonder why would I ever need this app? Why need anything? EDITOR NOTE: Tone down the existentialism. Tone up the excitement.

Ok, ok,  so my life can be a bit crazy. From work deadlines to meetings, social obligations to personal fulfilling activities, I lead a busy life. Who doesn’t? As I sat in traffic earlier today, I kept wondering why voice apps and then it hit: traffic. As we started to merge, so did my understanding.

“20 minutes until your girlfriend leaves.”

Constantly being in a car, merging, making sure the kids don’t kill each other in the back seat, or simply driving responsibly are all good reasons for your voice alarm. Studying, cooking or sculpting also are reasons. Anytime that you are so busy that you cannot unlock your iPhone and happen to be multitasking seems to be a good time for you to use this app.

“15 minutes until your girlfriend leaves”

But why this event? My iPhone is counting down to my social apocalypse.  It must be just for fun, so I left it on waiting for my girlfriend to notice. She did at five minutes.

“What did that say? Until what? Your girlfriend leaves?”

From that point onward every voice reminder was followed by my girlfriend’s sailor language, which is her only drawback. The only drawbacks to the app are that it cannot work in the background of other apps, so don’t plan on playing a game and being warned “five minutes until your boss is on this side of the floor again.” On that note, you cannot input your own event title.

“2 minutes until your girlfriend leaves”

I am happy by the arbitrary start point of the app. Sensibly, it beings on the help tab and educates you on how to use the entire app from the beginning. Here I learned that you can change the volume on individual events.

“30 seconds until your girlfriend leaves.”

So as the seconds dwindled, I edited the event and lowered the volume, but the damage had been done. 10 seconds before scheduled my girlfriend left. She said I should stop playing with my iPhone and start writing my app review.

“Your girlfriend should leave now.”

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